Colour Story

Christine Sherborne

Location P.O Box 3344,
Helensvale Town Centre,
Queensland 4212, Australia Email: chris@colourstory.com

Archive News

Archive News
Colourstory January Blessings & Giveaway

Colourstory January Blessings & Giveaway

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Blessings For You From Around the World

The Lord bless you and always keep you. May Heaven’s light shine on all that you do. May health and happiness come your way and love fill your heart throught each day.

May the Angels bring you blessings, of peace peace and harmony in this new year.

“I hope that in this year to come, you make mistakes.

Because if you are making mistakes, then you are making new things, trying new things, learning, living, pushing yourself, changing yourself, changing your world. You’re doing things you’ve never done before, and more importantly, you’re Doing Something.

So that’s my wish for you, and all of us, and my wish for myself. Make New Mistakes. Make glorious, amazing mistakes. Make mistakes nobody’s ever made before. Don’t freeze, don’t stop, don’t worry that it isn’t good enough, or it isn’t perfect, whatever it is: art, or love, or work or family or life.

Whatever it is you’re scared of doing, Do it.

Make your mistakes, next year and forever.”
Neil Gaiman

“Many things are thrown our way in this game of life. It’s how you deal with them that shows your true character. I want all of you to feel the hope, love & passion I feel for the upcoming year & the rest of my life. I want ALL of you to not only go for your dreams, but have a damn ass good time doing it! Love & Warmth, May ♥”
May Water

 

I have five copies of my latest audio to give away. Please email me if you would like one. This audio is from a new age perpsective. chris@colourstory.com

angels
Unseen Helpers from Invisible Realms – Angels

 

 


Benefits of Past Life Regression

Benefits of Past Life Regression

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Benefits of Past Life Regression

How will I benefit from a past life regression?

Many, phobias and fears have roots from past life experiences. When faced through regression you can deal with and heal them. Types of fears include fear of water, certain animals and even flying.

Relationship problems are often carried over from members of your soul family and remain unresolved. When you see what happened in your relationships during a previous life, you can often find the same problem is repeating itself, and deal with the issue today.

Many people faced violent deaths in past lives because of the times they lived through. These deaths can leave a person traumatized during future lives until faced and resolved. When you understand the reason for a present-day fear, your higher self and subconscious can heal you.

 

Can it hurt me in any way?

Your spiritual soul and subconscious have a way of protecting you from learning too much at once. For example, if you had experienced hard lives they would only be revealed to you a little at a time. Therefore, you’re protected by your psyche in this way. The hypnotist would guide you to rise above the scene and witness an event from afar. This is will lessen the client feeling distress by going through the experience.

In the same way, if your present life has been abusive your mind protects you to some extent from remembering abuse all at the same time. All hypnosis is self-hypnosis and you have complete control during sessions at all times.

You are in control. At any time you can open your eyes and stop the session.

 

Will I remember past lives?

Ninety percent of people will have no trouble remembering their past lives. Using the lighter Alpha level of hypnosis enables you to be aware. The client must approach the session with an open mind and be willing to relax and see what happens. Many people often feel the events they witness are make-believe or from a dream. This is common and even though they feel like this, the results is still the same. The events could be real or brought to light from their subconscious, or higher self. In all three cases, their past lives they experience are allowed to surface by their conscious mind for a reason. Your higher-self could arrange for you to remember an imaginary past life to heal a particular problem. The result is the same as a healing remembered from a real past life.

Therefore, if you are willing and allow yourself to relax and suspend any disbelief the chances are good that you will be successful in recalling several past lives. Think of the procedure as if engrossed in an excellent movie on television. Everything around you fades and your focus and attention centre on the screen, feeling all the action and emotion.

 

Will it work for me?

Many people have spent years in psychotherapy and found with one or two past life regressions their issues have been healed. For example a man who held a severe fear of heights experienced a past life where he fell to his death from a castle wall during a battle. He was completely cured. Why this works hypnotherapists can’t be sure, but the facts speak for themselves.

Just as you have spent years building problems, not all can healed in one session, but after each session you will notice an improvement over the next days and weeks. A particular strong phobia, for instance, can be the result of several past life events.

With effort on your part to fully engage in the past life regression, you will find difficulties begin to resolve and your will regain energy and focus in your present existence.

SelfHypnosis

Thank you to the many followers of Colourstory over the past fourteen years. As you can see as well as writing hypnosis audios I now practice Hypnotherapy on the Gold Coast Australia.
If you have enjoyed my hypnosis audios in the past I would like to ask a favour. Would you please follow me on my new pastlife-hypnosis Google Plus Page?
Also I would really appreciate a review for the page to help get my new business off the ground. Simply go into About and click on review. Thank you so much.

Here’s the link – Hypnosis Gold Coast Australia

Many thanks & Blessings
Chris


Gift from my Deceased Son – Amazing!

Gift from my Deceased Son – Amazing!

Chris_Necklace_Front Chris_Necklace_Back

Gift from my Deceased Son – Amazing!

This amazing story started many years ago when my youngest son Nicky was killed in a road accident. He rode his bike out of our driveway straight into the path of an oncoming car. He was thrown into the air and died instantly, at just ten years old.

Around six months ago I had an unusually vivid dream. An Angel handed me a gold necklace and chain. The oblong shaped pendant was intricately carved. As the months passed, I searched everywhere, in shops on the Internet but couldn’t find the necklace that matched the one in the dream.

Three weeks ago on Father’s Day, my husband Hugh and I went into an old jewelry store. In the glass cabinet, I saw the necklace, exactly like the one in my dream. The eighteen karat gold piece was fairly old and as beautiful as I remembered in the intense dream. I had to buy it.

As we sat back in our car I opened the package and examined the pendant. The ceramic image in the picture is Our Lady, Mary, Mother of Jesus. This reminded me of Nicholas as we had raised him Catholic and his gravestone had a statue of Mary next to it.

I turned the pendant over and to my astonishment Nicky’s initials were engraved on the back N.S. I couldn’t believe such a coincidence, in fact, it was a God-incidence! It had to have been orchestrated by a higher power and by Nicky himself, there is no other explanation.

We live on the Gold Coast in Australia, although originally from England. The same day we decided to drive into Surfer’s Paradise and saw that a Spirituality Fair was open. We went in and wandered around the stalls. People were going into a room at the back where a well-known Australian psychic was giving messages.

Hugh and I sat right at the back of the room and listened for a while. The man walked toward Hugh and pointed. He said, “I have a young boy here who died in a road accident. His name begins with M, no, N, Nicky. He tells me it happened a long time ago, and he wants to wish his Dad happy Father’s Day.”

Hugh, a skeptic, went white. He couldn’t believe the words that came out of the Psychic man’s mouth. After finding the pendant earlier in the day and now this, a direct message from our son Nicky, he’s changed his views. The evidence was undeniable.

 

By Christine Sherborne

 

Chris_Necklace_Back

 


Time for Change? Colourstory July Newsletter 2015

Time for Change? Colourstory July Newsletter 2015

quote dance

Time for Change?

You may have noticed I recently changed the book covers and titles for my Imogene Series. When I researched the art of good book covers, I realized they needed updating. A case of when you know better, you do better!

Have you considered any changes in your life recently? Life tends to get caught up in the daily grind and before you notice, months have passed. All the plans you made have fallen by the wayside and you’ve spent your time firefighting instead. Maybe it’s time to press the pause button and spend time in reflection.

Consider the areas where change may be needed. Family life or relationships, work and career, leisure time, health and lifestyle, not forgetting your spiritual life. Why not spend a few hours alone and ponder each life section and see if you can improve. Consider your future, plan something exciting you can look forward to, such as travel or trying out a new hobby.

Let’s look at each section. How’s your family life? Do your children look happy and have enough parental attention? How’s your primary relationship with your spouse or partner? Have you become strangers passing in the night because of work pressures? Perhaps you need to initiate steps to meet a potential partner? You know your family well and a few moments reflection, taking the time to tune into your intuition will soon highlight any issues.

How’s your career path, on track, or are you doing the same old, same old? Do you need to study any courses to advance your profession, or perhaps a complete change is called for? Spend the time to look closely at your job, workplace and associates, can you improve? Perhaps you’ve always wanted to become an artist and now work in an office, you could enroll in a night class in your favorite subject. Meditate, and see what thoughts arise, then act, taking steps to move towards your dreams.

Still wearing those few pounds from Christmas around your waist? Have you taken any time to exercise? Do you catch a fast, unhealthy lunch or dinner on the run? You know what you should be doing, but it’s not always so easy. After self-analysis perhaps you can make small changes, a little at a time, an action that’s doable!

How’s your spiritual life? Do you throw out a few prayers now and then, hoping a higher power hears you? Have you read any inspiring material of late? Did you decide to meditate every day then let the practice peter out on day three? Put aside time to be introspective, think about your soul, your spirit, and examine your deepest feelings. Does your inner essence need nurturing, a little fine-tuning perhaps?

What have you got to look forward to? The future will happen to you whether you move forward in a considered direction or not. Maybe it’s time to take control of your life and stop drifting? Perhaps you fancy a sea change and would love to live near the coast. The small business you would like may be possible. Do research, and you could find your dreams can come true with a little effort. Life becomes more enjoyable when you have exciting plans and goals!

Set aside the time to self-evaluate your life. You are worth it!

“Would you like me to give you
a formula for success?
It’s quite simple, really.
Double your rate of failure
You’re thinking of failure
as the enemy of success.
But it isn’t at all
You can be discouraged by failure-or
you can learn from it.
So go ahead and make mistakes.
Make all you can.
Because, remember
that’s where you’ll find success.
On the far side.”

Thomas John Watson, Sr.

Check out – Make no Little Plans

 


Part Three – Right Thinking Colourstory June Newsletter 2015

Part Three – Right Thinking Colourstory June Newsletter 2015

 

Belief

 

Part Three –Right Thinking

Read or View

Here, we’ll examine another three ways you think, and how to choose the right thoughts.

First, we’ll look at Mind Reading. This is when you’re sure you know how other people are thinking and feeling, without evidence. Also, you believe that you know how they feel toward you, and you could be wrong. This is a type of thinking that I’m guilty of according to my children. They nicknamed me “Mrs. Jump to Conclusions”!

Women, in particular, think this way. They agonize over a male partner’s feelings toward them if he’s inattentive, when he’s actually thinking how he can fix his car, or he’s studying a fly on the ceiling.

Never assume you know what someone else thinks, you don’t for sure. Ask gentle questions to find out the truth.

Fairness is often an illusion. Life is not always fair unfortunately, and believing it should be can make you feel resentful.You may think you know what is fair and right, and when people don’t agree you get upset. Sometimes, fairness depends on several points of view. What may seem fair to one person, is seen as biased by another. If you feel you are unfairly treated, try to look at all points of view. In that way, you may have a change of heart. But remember, life isn’t always fair and take those situations in your stride then put them behind you.

Do you pass your thoughts through a filter, by taking out the positive and focusing on the negative? We feel protective toward ourselves and try to see problems that lie ahead, but focusing on the negative binds your ability to act clearly in the situation. There are always many sides to a story, a silver lining perhaps. Before you blow up the bad side out of all proportion, look for the good.

Many seemingly bad situations turn out well. For example, you lose a job but soon find an even better one. The partner walks out and you’re devastated, but soon you meet someone new, who’s fantastic!

That’s part three of ‘Right Thinking’. If you would like to read all the parts together, please visit

http://www.colourstory.com/blog/


Part Two – Right Thinking Colourstory May Newsletter 2015

Part Two – Right Thinking Colourstory May Newsletter 2015

 

 

Life is about creating yourself.
Life is about creating yourself

Part Two –Right Thinking

Here, we’ll examine another three ways you think, and how to choose the right thoughts.

Welcome to Part Two – Right Thinking! If you missed Part One click here.

 

Read or Watch

Often people overgeneralize and can become paralyzed in some areas. For example, Sally sees a terrible plane crash on television and cancels her much anticipated holiday. She tells herself, planes aren’t safe, she’ll never fly again. One incident causes her to label all air travel dangerous. If she looked at crash data and expanded her knowledge of flying, she would see that in fact flying is 99% safe.

Try to avoid making general rules on little information. People make assumptions about race traits, for example, all Germans are arrogant. Religion is another area that people assume they know the absolute truth without having any idea what other faiths believe. Next time you’ll tempted to tar a person or subject with the same brush, pause, and think. Do your research and then choose the belief that seems right to you.

Do you make everything personal? Do you believe that people act in a particular way because of you? Perhaps, you use other people as a measuring stick, are they more attractive, cleverer and more put together than you. The truth is that if you realized how little you cross anyone’s mind you would be amazed, it’s minuscule. People live their own lives, and you should strive to live yours. Don’t personalize the actions of others, be your own person, and stop thinking about other people’s agenda’s and reactions.

Do your emotions control you? Just because you may feel you’re not good enough, that it’s automatically true, it’s not. A friend ignores you in the street, your emotions go into overdrive. “What’s up with her, have I done something to upset her?” The truth is, she didn’t see you. You can see how emotional thinking causes pain. Notice when you feel a rush of emotion, pause, and bring your critical thinking mind into focus. Is this emotion valid, or just a reaction to an event from a skewed perspective?

This one’s a biggie. You’re always trying to prove you’re right. Being a right fighter is tiring and causes conflict. The truth is, you’re not always right, and even if you are, is it worth the fight? As Doctor Phil often says, “would you rather be right than happy.” Right fighters are one of the unhappiest groups in society. Give up right fighting apart from exceptional circumstances, for example, where lives are at stake. Next time you find yourself ready to bite back at a friend, pause, and ask yourself if it’s worth it. Usually, it isn’t. Why waste your energy and time?

Undoubtedly, thinking affects your mood, your health and outlook on life. This three-part article explains typical wrong thinking and how to change those thoughts.

I hope you find this article helpful, and the third part of ‘right thinking’ will follow soon.

Check out – Understanding the Art of Allowing


Right Thinking – Part One Colourstory Newsletter April 2015

Right Thinking – Part One Colourstory Newsletter April 2015

 

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Right Thinking – Take Time to Think

Right Thinking – Part One

Read or View

Right thinking gets rewarded!

Undoubtedly, thinking affects your mood, your health and outlook on life. This three-part article explains typical wrong thinking and how to change those thoughts.

One common thinking mistake people make is Catastrophizing. You hear on the news that a particular batch of food is making people sick. You’ve eaten that food earlier in the week, you feel fine, but you worry that it came from the contaminated batch. Within moments, you feel ill and you’re going to die. The truth is the quantity was insignificant and the people affected contacted, and you are fine.

Watching the news and hearing of misfortunes can immobilize some people. Keep a clear head and examine the evidence. There’s no need to jump to conclusions over every little event and cause yourself pain. Stop, think, and calm down, the thing you fear is unlikely to happen.

Another way of negative thinking is blaming others for every upset that happens in your life. Conversely, you blame yourself. Neither way of thinking is correct. You have to take responsibility for your own life. Sure, other people’s actions may cause pain, but you can take responsibility for the way you feel, and the actions you take. You can say the same for self-blame. Realize that you are doing your best and can improve. By being kind to yourself and taking charge of your own actions and feelings, your thoughts will improve. In both cases find a better feeling thought. For example, my work colleague didn’t realize how his actions could affect me, or he wouldn’t have acted that way. I can get over it and find the silver lining in this or any situation.

Thinking you can force people to change because you depend on them for your happiness. The truth is you can only change yourself, and often by doing that, the other person changes anyway. For example, you tell your partner they must give up golf for your happiness. It’s only right that they should spend all their time with you. You may even get their compliance for a while, but the precious extra time that you want is spent sitting with a sullen unhappy partner.

If you decide to change and say take up golf or arrange other exciting occasions. The result could then turn out better than you imagined. Never, rely on believing you can change someone else’s behavior. It may work for a while but eventually, they will rebel or leave. Work on improving yourself, to make life enjoyable.

I hope you find this article helpful, and the second and third part of right thinking will follow soon.

Click here for – Best Self-Help, Inspirational Books

 


Materialism v Experiences – Newsletter April 2008

Materialism v Experiences – Newsletter April 2008

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Materialism v Experiences – Colourstory Newsletter April 2008

 

Materialism v Experiences

The Darkest Hour is Just before Dawn

Do Couples Tend to Look Alike?

  

Materialism V Experiences

What’s more important to you, a new expensive gadget or an unusual holiday somewhere exotic? Are you materialistic or do you prefer to fill your life with interesting experiences?

Did you know the people who regularly buy the latest new ‘thing’ become less happy and satisfied with their life, and more likely to suffer from depression?

Experiments have shown after a few weeks the people who’d purchased an experience such as a trip or visit to a concert enjoyed their memories. They remained more satisfied with the experience, than people who bought a physical item.

As time passes experiences often improve as you can remember moments like your first date or a child’s birth. Conversely, the great outfit you picked up in a sale is no longer recollected. The item is still just an object which gave momentary pleasure.

A car remains a car, even if it’s the latest model. A new vehicle only gives you pleasure for a limited time, whereas you keep memories as happy reminiscences.

When you talk to others about your experiences, they’re more interested than when bragging about your material purchases. If you enjoy enough experiences, you’re a more attractive and likable person, and people enjoy living them through you.

With material possessions you get aboard the comparison bandwagon – looking at which new car your neighbor has, how much bigger their boat. This causes unhappiness and discontent, because there’s always someone who has a nicer car or makes more money than you do. If you’re the one, who has the most possessions the envy of your friends is still fleeting, compared with having wonderful life experiences.

Experiences tend to be unique than material possessions. The latest gadget is one of millions being sold throughout the world. When you enjoy a day out with your family and share play with your children, you release endorphins. Often, the person who owns the most toys and values them above relationships eventually ends unhappy and lonely.

 

The Darkest Hour is just before Dawn

You may remember these words from a popular eighties song. Have you woken up during the early hours and let your fears wash over you? This magical moment appears to be the time we’re most vulnerable to negative thinking. In the early hours the solution you thought would solve your problem, throws you a curveball. Everything looks impossible to deal with and overcome.

You feel at your lowest and you lie there wishing you could fall back to sleep, so you didn’t have to think about your problems.

Here are several tactics you can use to help you overcome these unwelcome thoughts.

  1. First feel your fear. Doctor Phil says, “You can’t change what you won’t acknowledge.” Get into the imagined scenario and think about the worst outcome you can possibly imagine. Then tell yourself you can survive the worst. You have survived past negative events and you can survive future ones. Your spirit is much stronger than you believe.

Then accept this is normal to feel this way in these circumstances. Anyone would feel this way if they found themselves in a similar crises. Fear is a normal part of life.

  1. Go now into your mental movie studio. Get comfortable and create a film across the imaginary screen before you. Imagine yourself capable and competent. Let the imagined catastrophe unfold before you. But in this movie you can achieve the result you want. You’re skilled, intelligent and gifted. You can deal with this in a way will have a happy result for you.
  2. Affirm to yourself you have handled problems over the years and you can handle this one easily and well.
  3. If you’re still having problems removing your fear, mentally return to your movie studio and replay the circumstances. This time I want you to turn everything you see to represent a comedy, ridiculous and funny. Use your imagination to create an entertaining drama. The situation becomes amusing, the people become hilarious, and you laugh your fear away.

I hope this helps the next time you have the four o’clock horrors!

 

Do Couples Look Alike?

Studies have shown that after being with another person for twenty-five years or more, they do have similar facial features. The aging is partly a factor, but other reason come into play.

The main reason could be a shared diet. For example, high-fat foods would produce a chubbier look to both faces.

The second reason is couple share the same environment. For example, if they lived in a hot climate they would both develop similar coloring and wrinkles.

They may choose their mate with a similar personality. Therefore, a jolly couple would both develop crinkles around the eyes. A depressing couple would both look sad.

Couples empathize with each other’s’ feelings. This could cause their expressions to match, perhaps smile wrinkles or frown lines. Again the habitual facial expressions for both people would produce similar wrinkles and furrows on their faces.

Perhaps you could look at your partner’s parents and see what life has wrought on their faces. The future could be similar for their offspring, your partner. The thought might be a scary one, or maybe a pleasant one if you’re lucky!

Click here for – Best Self-Help, Inspirational Books

 


The Incredible Power of Thought – Newsletter July 2007

The Incredible Power of Thought – Newsletter July 2007

Courage quote
The Incredible Power of Thought

 

Learning to Listen

The Penalty of Procrastination

The Incredible Power of Thought

Home Blessing

Revs. Alan and Kathryn Rowbotham used this home blessing for many years in their ministry and many have been benefited by it. Any time is good for a home blessing, whether you have just moved in or have lived in your home for many years. We hope you enjoy using this special home blessing for yourself.

The blessing is adapted from The Consecration of the Room, an out-of-print pamphlet written by Mary Brewerton De Witt.

We suggest that you print out this page so that you may read it aloud more comfortably when you are speaking the words of the prayer blessing.

Sit calmly in the room and speak these words aloud:

There is only one presence in this home. This one presence is the presence of God, or good. No evil can enter here. There is no evil in God. God, the good, dwells here. Whoever enters here will be conscious of the one divine presence of good.

There is only one presence here. This presence is the presence of life. There is no death here, nor fear of death. There is only life here. All fear is cast out. Whoever enters here will be conscious of this life, the pure, holy life of God.

There is only one presence here. This presence is the presence of Truth. No untrue thing can enter here. There is no falsehood, no deception, no envy, no jealousy, no selfishness, in this home. Every untrue thought is cast out. Whoever enters here will be conscious of the presence of Truth.

There is only one presence here, the presence of health. No sickness can enter here; no impurity or fear can enter here. All weakness and sickness are cast out. Whoever enters here will be conscious of the presence of health.

There is only one presence here, the presence of purity. No impure thought can enter here. I live and dwell in the pure and holy presence of God. Whoever enters here will be conscious of the pure and holy presence of God.

This home is filled with peace and harmony. I dwell in the presence of peace. No restless or discordant thought can enter here. No irritation or fear can enter here. The presence of God is peace. Whoever enters here will be conscious of the presence of peace.

This home is filled with prosperity. I cannot lack for any good thing. There is no dissatisfaction here. Whoever enters here will be conscious of contentment, satisfaction, and prosperity.

This home is filled with beauty. There is only one presence here, the presence of beauty. In God is all spiritual beauty. My home is glorified by His holy presence. Whoever enters here will be conscious of the beauty of holiness.

There is one presence here, the presence of wisdom. All foolishness, ignorance, doubt, and superstition are cast out. God is here and God is wisdom. I live and move in the presence of wisdom. Whoever enters here will be conscious of wisdom.

There is only one presence here, the presence of joy. Joy radiates here, filling this home. No sorrow can enter here. All depression is cast out. The joy of the Lord is here. I am surrounded by joy. I am filled with joy and happiness. Whoever enters here will be conscious of the presence of joy.

Only love dwells here. This home is filled with the presence of love. God is love, and love is here. All anger, hatred, and revenge are cast out. Love fills these walls. In love I live, move, and have my being. Whoever enters here will be conscious of the pure, holy presence of love.

I am thankful to Thee, O Father, that this home is filled with Thy presence. I am thankful that I live and move in Thee, O God, Thou holy One. I am thankful that I live in Thy life, Truth, health, prosperity, peace, wisdom, joy, and love. I am thankful that all who enter here will be conscious of Thy presence. ——————— This blessing may be enlarged upon and added to; all those who use it realize the Truth in the word, for every good word is a power.

Note: These blessings may be used also as prayers for spiritual development, peace, harmony, health, or prosperity, either for self, family member, friend, relative, or pet, or for business firms, institutions, the city, the country, or the whole world. Ideas as to the best method to follow will present themselves to you for each individual situation.

A plan that has proved helpful for some is to begin with the first statement, and use each prayer for one week, holding the thought several times daily. The following format will show beginners how to adapt the prayer to various needs:

“There is only one presence in me (you – this room – this institution – this city – this country – the world). This one presence is the presence of God, the good. No evil can enter here (come near me – you – this institution – this city- this country – the world). There is no evil in God. God, the good, dwells here (in me – in you – in this city). Whoever enters here (this room – this store – this building – this institution – this city) (comes near me – you) will be conscious of the one divine presence of good.”

Remember – God is Blessing You, Right Now!

Rev. Alan A. Rowbotham —————————————————————— Please feel free to send this newsletter article to a friend. If you happen to have received this article from someone else and you’d like to have more of where this came from, you can sign up for this “Spiritual Solutions” newsletter at http://www.spiritualsolutionsblog.com/newsletter.php

Learning how to listen

One of the greatest skills that we can acquire is the ability to listen to others. Some of the most liked people have this ability. Everyone likes to feel that they are important enough to be listened to without interruptions. If you acquire the ability to listen well you will soon find that you are a very popular person.

The other advantage to being a good listener is that you learn and understand much more about what is going on. How many times have you found yourself waiting to jump into a conversation with you own self-absorbed story, not really listening to the current speaker? Do you find that you often give unsought for advice? Maybe you are one of those listeners who can’t wait to correct others, or criticize what they are saying.

When you are in a conversation, if you find that you interrupt rudely and jump in to correct the speaker, then I encourage you to cultivate the art of listening.

So, what makes a good listener?

  • Firstly, try to relax when in conversation and give yourself the opportunity to enjoy what the other person is saying.
  • Give the speaker your full attention – make sure they know you are listening, by nodding and making encouraging expressions.
  • Clear your mind of whatever you find yourself ready to jump in with.
  • Try not to have any preconceived ideas of what the person is saying, they may come out with something totally off the wall and not what you are thinking at all.
  • Pay attention to the emotion behind the words.       Notice the expressions on their face and if their body language is tense or relaxed.
  • Try to listen to the message behind the words, what is not being said, try to detect the real meaning behind their actual words.
  • When the other person pauses to take a breath, train yourself to wait and give them chance to carry on with their train of thought. Encourage them to continue with their story by giving encouraging signs or short words such as, and….. then…..so….. etc   They will love you for it.
  • Validate what they are saying by allowing them to own their own experience and emotions without you trying to change that.
  • Never try and top their story with an even better one of your own, this leaves them feeling very deflated.
  • Try not to give advice unless asked for but encourage them to talk it out until they come to their own conclusions.
  • Always assume that what someone has shared with you is confidential and don’t allow yourself to gossip about the conversation with others.
  • If you don’t have time to listen, then say straight away that it isn’t a good time for you, and reschedule another opportunity for them.

As well as active listening, try to develop other skills, such as empathy, patience and a warm personality, and when talking yourself, always be interesting and attentive to your audience, to ensure you keep them interested.

They can conquer who believe they can. He has not learned the first lesson of life who does not every day surmount a fear.   Ralph Waldo Emerson

Joy can be real only if people look upon their life as a service, and have a definite objective in life outside themselves and their personal happiness.     Leo Tolstoy

 

The Penalty of Procrastination

All of us procrastinate to some extent, always putting off what we should be doing today until tomorrow or next week, but there is a price to pay for habitually procrastinating.

Delaying action on our dreams and goals can waste our life.  Today is our only reality, as tomorrow doesn’t yet exist, and yesterday has already gone beyond our grasp. Many people keep putting action off ‘until’ – Until the children go to school – Until the children leave home – Until we retire – Until you find that you have reached the end of your life, and have many regrets about all the things you were going to do, but missed out on.

Procrastinating is habit forming, and eventually becomes a way of life, causing you to never achieve anything of value. There’s nothing sadder than a wasted life. Eventually, whilst you are putting off work on your own plans, you create a vacuum, which other people will help you fill with their agenda, leaving yours unfulfilled.

Procrastinators always wait until the last minute to act, causing them more work and stress than if they acted promptly. Also, because they are always behind with everything, they do not have time for most of the interesting things of life, and complain that life is boring, because nothing interesting happens in their life.

Minor problems ignored often become major disasters if left unsolved. Sometimes, of course, problems do resolve themselves without input from us, but by no means all. Sometimes minor problems cause more minor problems which together add up to major ones which cannot then be resolved.

Procrastinators pay a high price. It can affect all areas of your life. For instance, your health could be poor because you put off going to the doctor’s; you could miss out on opportunities because you were late getting there; you may even miss the one person who is right for you, because you are not in the right pace at the right time. Procrastination causes you to lose control over life, your future, and you often have unhappy relationships and a second-rate career. It can become a life of frustration and fatigue, and unfulfilled dreams.

To improve your life, firstly acknowledge that you have this problem. What you don’t acknowledge you can’t change as Dr Phil says.

Here are some tips to help you:

When a project looks overwhelming, break it down into smaller tasks. Write one page a day, make five phone calls off your list each day, or start saving for your dream trip one day at a time. Divide your tasks into ten minute time blocks. Most people can work on something for ten minutes.

Prioritise! Do the important or unpleasant jobs first. This will make you feel good about yourself and stop you being in a constant state of anxiety. Again, disagreeable jobs can often be broken down into smaller segments. If for instance you decide to clean up the garage you can work on that task for ten minutes a day and before long it will be done and you will feel proud of yourself. If the job is something unpleasant like writing a letter of complaint, then just do it and get it out of the way. You will be glad that you did. (Not to me please!)

  • Prepare your plan of action.
  • The night before make a to-do list.
  • Get ready for tasks you have to do.
  • Go out and buy the cleaning products or items you need to complete the task.
  • Just take some action that moves you in the right direction.
  • List out for yourself all the advantages of completing a task.
  • Think of ways that you can reward yourself for a task completed.

Each night resolve to accomplish two tasks the next day. Often ask yourself what is the best use of my time today? Above all, be courageous and make up your mind to tackle your most pressing problem or go after your best opportunity today.

The Incredible Power of Thought

The first important tool is the use of your thoughts. Whatever you hold in your mind and mostly think about will be manifested in your life, whether good or bad. Proverbs 23:7 says ‘as a man thinks so is he’.   The negative outcome of negative thoughts was apparent in the bible book of Job 3:25, when he said: ‘For the thing, which I greatly feared, is come upon me, and that which I was afraid of is come unto me’.   Job ended up loosing everything, all his livestock, wealth and all of his ten children.

In fact, the more emotion that you put into your thinking, the greater effect it has. Your mind is very powerful, and consists of the conscious, sub-conscious and super-conscious minds.   When you hold something strongly in your conscious mind, your sub-conscious mind works on that thought, and utilising the super-conscious mind eventually returns to you that condition in your life.

Be specific with your requests. If you are looking for a new relationship, for instance, think carefully about the attributes that you would like that person to have. Make a list, repeatedly look at it and speak out your desire.

If it’s a new home that you would like, study the market and type of homes that attract you. Cut out pictures of your perfect house. Visualise the images and imagine living in that house. Go and visit those types of houses. Pray as you walk around the building and claim this house or something better as your own.

It may be that you would like to get rid of conflict in your family or work place. Imagine harmony and peace being in that place and with the people involved. Pray for their happiness and well being. Speak out words of calm and peace.

Appreciate the blessings that you have, and thank God for them. Have faith that you will receive even more blessing in your life, and live in an attitude of gratitude.

Don’t give up too easily. These processes take time. Remember that in order for your desires to come to fruition it may mean lots of circumstances in other people’s lives have to change as well. Get into the habit of checking your thoughts and bring them back to the thing or situation that you want.

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Has someone burst your bubble? Newsletter August 2007

Has someone burst your bubble? Newsletter August 2007

Love life
Has someone burst your bubble?

 

Has someone burst your bubble?

We have dreams, particularly when young and vulnerable. Have you experienced telling someone about dreams you hold in your heart, only to have them shoot them down in flames?

They tell you the reasons you will fail, it can’t be done and will never happen, or someone else tried and went broke. Reluctantly you may pack your dream away in some bottom drawer at the back of your mind, making their predictions your reality.

This has happened to me many times, more than most, in fact, as I’m a big dreamer.

Asked as an eight-year-old to stand up in class at school to sing a song my first bubble burst. I loved singing and thought I could sing quite well. After attempting to sing just the first line, the teacher ordered me to sit down and never sing in his class again. He said I sang so badly and out of tune he couldn’t bear to listen.

Now you can imagine the effect of this on a child and in front of the whole class. It’s probably true, I do find it difficult to hold a tune – definitely not my talent. Even so, a couple of years later I joined the church choir, so I must have improved. I didn’t let this teacher kill my confidence to sing but even to this day whenever I sing his words come straight into my mind.

More than ten years ago I told a friend my heart’s desire included writing articles or books to help other people. His response to laugh. How could I succeed as an unknown, no one would be interested in what I have to say.
Although I found this hurtful, I have always been a person who can bounce back and one who would succeed just to prove the naysayer wrong.

But the same isn’t true of everyone and there must be a highway of broken dreams spanning the globe, crushed by thoughtless and careless words of others.
Being me, it made me even more determined to follow my heart and have a go anyway. So far, I have written in many different forms and have felt the pleasure of positive feedback from readers or listeners who have enjoyed my work. We have different dreams and would like to share them. I think we have to be careful to whom we reveal our deepest thoughts and wishes. Ask yourself, are they positive people? Can they keep our confidences? Do they encourage you?

These are the questions you need to ask, whether family or friends. You need to assess the answers before you reveal one word of your ideas.

I’m blessed to have a friend who’s a great encourager and who has proven over many years she can and does keep my confidences secret. We need to have a friend like this, and I encourage you to find special person who will be your support and a foundation on which you can build your dreams.

I dare do all that may become a man; who dares do more is none- William Shakespeare

A poor man is not that one without a cent. A poor man is that one without a dream- Henry Ford

Simple diet changes to lose weight and relieve aches and pains!

As you age you get more aches and pains, our stomach often becomes bloated. You can gain weight and have inflammation in your joints.

If this describes you, then I have good news! I came across an old book in a charity book sale which offered solutions to all these problems. The book advised many these symptoms are because of consuming yeast products. The yeast gradually overloads the body and symptoms develop after a few years. Hence the aging connection.

I have tried cutting out yeast myself and have tested the theory on friends over the past five weeks and received great results. Of course you must stop eating yeast filled food products such as bread, cakes, biscuits and also beer and mushrooms. Don’t eat leftovers, even if stored in the fridge. Leftovers grow a mold quickly and contains yeast you can’t detect by looking at the food. Any leftovers should get frozen straight away and then reheated.
If you think about it, yeast makes bread rise and the famous beer belly is well known. Maybe the yeast affects your body in a similar way it changes food.

I have added an extra rule useful to me. Buy only lactose-free milk and yogurts. They can be found in every supermarket, usually on the top-shelf. You can buy both full cream and low-fat milk. Just as creamy as the typical products, but the lactose has been pre-broken down for you, making them easier to digest.

People who have eliminated the above for five weeks the following as occurred:
Stomach Bloating reduced by 30-40 mm.
Weight loss average 2-3 kilos.
Significant improvement of general inflammation.
Significant reduction in aches and pains.

This is not a diet as such. Well, perhaps an elimination diet, avoiding the yeast and lactose products and substituting alternatives. You can still eat as much other foods as you normally do. You will find you need a little time to get used to not eating bread and means a bit more cooking, but well worth the effort.

Whatever age you can benefit from cutting out yeast and lactose from your diet.
If you decide to try this method, please email me and let me know the results.

How to Encourage Yourself

When people beat you down either intentionally or otherwise, you need to develop the skills to be your own encourager.

First, always believe in yourself. You know yourself better than anyone else and you have memories of past successes. You can believe in yourself because in times past you have been an over-comer, and what you have achieved long ago, you can succeed again.
Value what you already have. This includes your family and friends, your health, the roof over your head and enough food to eat. Many people in other parts of the world lack some or all of these necessities of life. If you have them, you’re truly blessed. In fact, if you have these things then you are in the top five percent of the world’s population.

When you notice thoughts of self-criticism and other negative grievances arise then stop and immediately replace those thoughts with helpful, positive ones. Tell yourself you are a unique person who deserves to be loved and especially to love yourself.

Have confidence and faith in your own intuition. Your gut feeling is so often right. You may tend to push those gut feelings away if they don’t fit in with your core beliefs. Try to recognize this type of self-sabotage and act on your intuition.

The more you use your intuition, the more reliable your insight.

You will create mistakes in life. If you don’t, then you must be the most uninteresting person. By not trying anything new, and never venturing out of your comfort zone, you become boring. Quickly forgive yourself for those mistakes, and move on. Dwelling on past errors is a waste of time, energy, and emotion. Learn from them and move on.
Allow yourself to be inspired and creative. Actively seek new experiences to awaken the artist in you. Become passionate about new areas and new projects. Give yourself time to dream and explore new possibilities.

I encourage you to become a self-encourager, but also to be an encourager to others. They will love you for it.

 

Nothing will ever be attempted, if all possible objections must first be overcome.Samuel Johnson

To be what we are, and to become what we are capable of becoming, is the only end of life. Robert Louis Stevenson

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Simplify Your Life – Newsletter September 2008

Simplify Your Life – Newsletter September 2008

Simplify your Life

Simplify Your Life - Newsletter September 2008
Simplify Your Life – Newsletter September 2008

 

Wouldn’t you like to simplify your life? You probably experience more stress than you need to, because life is too complex. Today, we’re bombarded with information from many sources, directly and indirectly. This makes life very complicated, as you struggle with emails, papers, bills and people, worried in case you miss something. There are some tactics which can help you make each day run a little smoother.

First, take timeout to get organized. By taking the time to work out routine tasks, you can save yourself much frustration. Check out these ideas:

Just mark off on the calendar when you have regular appointments, birthdays, etc. Set up automatic bank and other monthly payments.
Organize a proper place for possessions. For instance, how much time do you spend searching for keys or spectacles? Always put items away in the same location. Over a year, you’ll gain hours of free time you typically spend looking for them.
Entrust other people with tasks that are time-consuming that you don’t like, but they do. Most people feel overworked and lack spare time. Farm out jobs to family members, such as picking up the dry-cleaning, or grocery shopping.
Be on time for appointments, this will help you keep a schedule, plus you’ll get a reputation for being dependable, and responsible. Diary out free time so you don’t over commit.
List making can make an enormous difference in the total you can achieve, and will reduce the constant worry of trying to remember everything. At the end of each working day, take the time to write out a list of jobs for the next day. Set priorities and do the most important tasks first.
You will find it less stressful to complete one job at a time. Do the most important tasks first, but finish them before starting on the next one on the list.
Plan meals and shopping list for the week, then cooking the evening meal will be a breeze. You’ll have the ingredients available, and won’t be picking up unhealthy takeaways.
Record any television programs that you enjoy, and then watch them when you have time. No longer will you dash about because there’s something on you simply can’t miss!
When stressful conditions start to build, deal with them straight away. Deal with them before they grow and take more time and effort to sort them out or put them right.
Finally, de-clutter your home and workspace. By tidying, living and working areas, you will not only be able to live more simply, but a neat home will give you peace of mind and allow you to relax.

There are many more actions you could take to simplify life, but I hope these few suggestions will gain you a few more hours and reduce pressure.

 

How the Rich get Wealthy

A study on the lifestyle of a group of wealthy men showed the following results.

Most of them had lived in the same town all their life. They owned a service business or a group of shops. They resided in a pleasant neighborhood in a moderate house. Their neighbors didn’t know that they were wealthy. They were frugal in their spending, driving an older car and buying their suits on sale. They had wives who were similar to themselves and were not big spenders. They had been married to the same woman all their adult life.

Each year, they invested at least twenty percent of their income in stocks or saving accounts. They bought products that appreciated with time, such as art or antiques.

These men loved their work and worked hard, putting in at least a fifty or sixty hour week. Their children didn’t know the extent of their wealth, and, became financially independent and not reliant on handouts. Interesting isn’t it.
Perhaps we could take a few pointers from this study!

“Success in business requires training and discipline and hard work. But if you’re not frightened by these things, the opportunities are just as great today as they ever were”. – David Rockefeller

 

Are you a know-it-all?

I am sure you’re not, but you probably know someone who is! If you tend in that direction, chances are you don’t have many friends!

Know-it-alls are egotistical people. They find it difficult to listen without interrupting. They want to be the center of attention and to be the one that others listen too. Being natural ‘right fighters’ they can’t understand why their lives are unhappy.

As Doctor Phil says, “do you want to be right, or do you want to be happy? When you fail to listen to others, you fail to learn anything new.
How do you feel when someone dominates the conversation? When you give and take in a conversation, you gain more satisfaction.
Try saving knowledge for future discussions. Allow others to have a different view. There is not always a ‘right answer’ sometimes several different viewpoints can all be valid.
The right answer for one person could be the wrong answer for another. Practice being kind and allow others to think they are right sometimes, even if you don’t believe they are. Don’t assume that you do know-it-all as no one possibly can!

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Being flexible and open to Change – Newsletter October 2008

Being flexible and open to Change – Newsletter October 2008

Being flexible and open to change

 

Flexible and open to Change
Flexible and open to Change

 

Are you flexible and open to change?

A few years ago we lived in a village in the South of England and had family friends who had five children. The organized capable mother didn’t like change. For instance, she planned each meal as well as how the family should spend each day, months in advance. If she asked to go anywhere without having at least several weeks’ notice, she simply found an outing impossible to do.

One day friends invited family to join them at the beach for the day. The beach lay several hours drive away, unfortunately although she had no real plans, she couldn’t force herself to go at first. Her husband urged her to go, eventually wearing her down until she agreed. Because she didn’t like or enjoy the change in her plans, she ensured she made the day miserable for everyone else.

She wasn’t able to see how restricted she made her life as well as the lives of her family. Her days passed by uneventful, which included her family’s days too.

Unfortunately several years after we met this family someone murdered her as well as her baby. Another woman had developed a crush on her husband, then took their lives in a horrific way.

She felt if she controlled her life and didn’t attempt risks she would be safe, but sadly, it wasn’t the case. How better to have lived, enjoyed experiences – taken a few chances.

When you have the opportunity to try something new, what’s your reaction? Do you grab the opportunity with both hands or do you stay in your rut? How flexible are you to change?

In business and in your daily life you can find resistance to change costly. The capacity to be open to change has an enormous impact on your life, both emotionally as well as financially. How many opportunities do you pass up? I urge you to be open to new ideas, changes, and opportunities, as you only pass this way one time.

Optimist Creed” by Christian D Larson

Why not copy this creed and print it out, putting it somewhere that you will see and read it often?

“Promise yourself…

“To be so strong that nothing can disturb your peace of mind.
“To talk health, happiness, and prosperity to every person you meet.
“To make all your friends feel that there is something worthwhile in them.
“To look at the sunny side of everything and make your optimism come true.
“To think only of the best, to work only for the best, and to expect only the best.
“To be just as enthusiastic about the success of others as you are about your own.
“To forget the mistakes of the past and press on to the greater achievements of the future.
“To wear a cheerful countenance at all times and give every living creature you meet a smile.
“To give so much time to the improvement of yourself that you have no time to criticize others.
“To be too large for worry, too noble for anger, too strong for fear, and too happy to permit the presence of trouble.
“To think well of yourself and to proclaim this fact to the world, not in loud words but in great deeds.
“To live in the faith that the whole world is on your side so long as you are true to the best that is in you.”

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The Secret of Lifting Depression -Newsletter March 2009

The Secret of Lifting Depression -Newsletter March 2009

 

The Secret of Lifting Depression -Newsletter March 2009
The Secret of Lifting Depression -Newsletter March 2009

 

The Secret of Lifting Depression and Countering Negative Thinking

Many of us just don’t notice when we are sabotaging our happiness by thinking negatively. Often we allow our thoughts to follow down the dark hole of discontent and sometimes despair.
Do you forget to control your thinking? It is not surprising if you do, as you have been conditioned to think in the way that you learned in childhood. If your parents or caregivers were worrywarts then it’s likely you will be too.

However, you’re now an adult and can make different choices for yourself. Your happiness is already there, living in the deepest part of you. It is not something you have to chase after, you already have it. The trick is to access it. The more you learn to tap into your inner store of joy and peace, the more often you’ll experience these delightful emotions.

You can choose which path you allow your thoughts to follow. Thinking is the one activity that you can’t switch off, but you can decide which thoughts to focus upon, and the thoughts to let go of. First make the decision to choose happiness and peace, allow these feelings to be the bedrock of your daily life. The second action is to notice thoughts at regular times throughout your day. The way I do this is to have little notes, on my computer, on the bathroom mirror, etc. The note reads,
I am the thinker. I am responsible for the thoughts that I allow my mind to focus on or dismiss.

Obviously, you have to be aware of your thoughts to control them. Common thoughts often recall upsetting times in your past or worry about future events. This kind of thinking is not serving you well. Today your past is gone and is only a memory and the future hasn’t yet happened. Thinking about either is a waste of time, energy and emotion.

It’s true that you have to make plans or deal with issues, but you don’t have to dwell on them. The more you think negative thoughts, the less wisdom and commonsense you will show in dealing with them.  When you allow yourself to be happy and focus on the thoughts that make you happy, then you’ll receive the wisdom to deal with life’s challenges, naturally.

When you notice a negative thought arrive, just acknowledge it, and then dismiss it. Then immediately focus on a happy memory or a perhaps start to work on an activity that you enjoy. Over time you can channel your thoughts into positive and happier ways. With practice it will get easier and easier, and you’ll learn to do this automatically.

Other tools you can use to attract more positive feelings, is meditation and hypnosis. But simply the act of acknowledging the thoughts and taking the positive action each time is all you need. Many of you may feel that you haven’t got the ability to control your thought life, but I assure you it’s possible. Many thoughts that pop into your mind aren’t real, and you don’t have to accept them. You can challenge them and change them in any way you want. You are the thinker. You are responsible and in control.

Thought, like all potent weapons, is exceedingly dangerous if mishandled. Clear thinking, is desirable not only in order to develop the full potentialities of the mind, but also to avoid disaster. Giles St. Aubyn

“We are what we think. All that we are arises with our thoughts. With our thoughts, we make the world.” Buddha

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Yes, Thoughts really are Things! – August 2012

Yes, Thoughts really are Things! – August 2012

Yes, Thoughts really are Things!
Yes, Thoughts really are Things!

Yes, Thoughts really are Things!

Yes, thoughts really are things!  Just think about this, every man-made item on the planet would have not come into being without thought. Even the planet Earth and the entire universe was once a thought in the Creators mind.

The fact of the matter is every choice you make creates your reality and, of course, every choice is first a thought then an action. Your life unfolds exactly the way your thoughts direct it.

Negative thoughts you’ve made in the past are creating your present future. So now is the time to notice your thoughts, and choose a better feeling thought. For example, ‘I’ll never get a decent job,’ can be, ‘I’ve had well-paying jobs in the past and will again.’

Every little negative thought isn’t building up an unpleasant future. It’s only when you dwell on such thoughts with feeling, that you draw similar circumstances into your life.

Thoughts create your moods of course, and your attitude either make your life better or more uncomfortable. They draw people and opportunities toward you or push them away.

Now keep in mind that thoughts can affect your health in many ways. Several studies have shown that fear can create illness in either your body or mind. You will know some people who rarely get sick because they affirm that they never catch a cold or the flu.

These are just a few ways that thoughts become things without even thinking in a metaphysical way.
Thoughts create energy and precisely like radio or television waves this energy goes out from your mind and affects both people and objects. Just think about people who may be nice to you, but you know by picking up on their energy they really don’t like you at all. It works the same for them too!

We know from recent knowledge about quantum particles that energy is moving around us and through us, all the time. It is the energy produced by our thoughts and using these tiny particles that allow us to send messages any distance to anybody and affect their minds.

Are you beginning to see how checking your thoughts can bring great dividends? When you start to notice habitual negative tapes playing in your mind, you have the opportunity to replace them with uplifting thoughts.

Little by little, you become free of self-defeating thinking and life will become so much easier.
Today, think loving and uplifting thoughts. Send out these same thoughts to your friends, family and work colleagues and see how they affect those people in your life. Be ready for a few surprises!

The trouble with many of us is that we underestimate the power of simplicity. We have a tendency to over complicate our lives and forget what’s important and what’s not. We mistake movement for achievement. We have a habit of focusing on activities instead of results.

Throughout your day, notice your thoughts. Always, strive for the better feeling thought, until it becomes a habit. The better you feel the better life you attract.

And as the pace of life continues to race along in the outside world, we forget that we have the power to control our lives regardless of what’s going on outside. – Robert Stuberg

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Are you trying to Live up to Other People’s Expectations?

Are you trying to Live up to Other People’s Expectations?

Are you trying to Live up to Other People’s Expectations?

Are you trying to Live up to Other People’s Expectations?
Are you trying to Live up to Other People’s Expectations?

Are you trying to Live up to Other People’s Expectations? Let me ask you this “What is the Real Price of Caring What others think?”

How many people are in trouble right now because they took on a huge mortgage that they could barely afford? Others bought a bigger car, an extra car or maybe staged an expensive wedding? They have closets full of designer clothing, handbags and shoes that they hardly wear and now a credit card debt they can’t repay.

Because of debt constant stress and arguments fill their homes. Their children suffer as they watch their parent’s relationship breakdown. Even the children catch this (caring what others think bug) they get upset when their parents can no longer afford the designer outfits they want to impress their friends and schoolmates. Are these the values we want our children to learn?

There are many ways of hurting ourselves by trying to look good in front of our peers. Take the perfect Mom syndrome. “Yes, I will help at the school fete and anything else you ask of me.” “No, I can’t send my child to school on a special day with a shop bought cake.” Rather they spend hours making an impressive unique creation.
We strive to look and be our best at work, offering hours of overtime to the disadvantage of our family life. We spend time with people we no longer have anything in common with, attend social events we have no interest in, to look good.

It’s time to wake up and think about ourselves and our family. Time to create an affordable and sustainable future based on our own preferences. Do you think people care about what you wear or do, where you live and what you drive? And even if they do, does it affect you?

As a teenager I complained about an outfit that I thought wasn’t fashionable. I wanted to look like the ‘cool’ kids, my grandmother said this to me…“If we realized how often people thought about us, we would find that it was almost never!” The truth is most people think about themselves 99% of the time. They have their own problems, and scarcely give you a second thought. Even so, we find ourselves running our lives in the way that we think pleases and impresses them.

So many of us are scrambling around trying to look and act in the ways that we believe people expect of us. Wouldn’t it be more relaxing to be our own person? When we spend money, you can’t afford, on the latest fashions, the best car, or a house, merely to impress our friends and neighbors, we regret it later.

It is time to understand that when we’re living life in a way that we think will impress others or make them envious, we are hurting ourselves and heading for disaster. When, what other people think about us starts to control our life, it’s time to change.

There are times, of course, when it’s prudent to consider our effect on other people. At times like a job interview or meeting our “in-laws” for the first time.

I am not recommending that we shouldn’t make any attempt to dress nicely or drive a reasonable car which is safe or live in a pleasant neighborhood. If we can afford it, and it’s what we want, then there’s no problem. We need to be aware of our motivating force before we spend more than we can afford or want.

The problem lies in ‘maxing’ out credit cards, or having a large mortgage, or spending in other ways to impress others. It’s just not worth it for the loss of peace of mind, and maybe risking our future if we unexpectedly lose our job or some unforeseen outlay comes along.

Doesn’t it make more sense to live within our means, and include a saving plan within our budget? That way, we’ll have a nest egg for hard times instead of being in the unenviable position of having to offload a fancy car or sell our house in an unfavorable market. Find other ways to build self-worth by being a loving parent, a good friend or helping others when we can. These actions will give us far more happiness and a feeling of security, connection and belonging.

By being ourselves, believing in ourselves, and being true to us, we’ll discover that life becomes more enjoyable, tranquil and less of a rat race. Remember that we’re unique human beings, and we’re here to fulfill our divine destiny. We’re not here to collect stuff and not to live our lives to someone else’s agenda.

Take a few moments right now to reflect on your own life and see if you need to make any changes. Look at your belongings, the way you use your time, the real friends you have around you, and reflect on your motivating force. By looking inward and understanding yourself you’ll be in a position to make rational life choices. Choices that move you forward and give you a better future for yourself and your family.

Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.                             Mark Twain
Life Makeover System

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